Circumdoleō

Circumdoleō (I suffer or feel pain on all sides) is a dramatic view into the minds of individuals, asking the threatening question, “what do you fear most?”. The series is a collaboration with selected individuals with whom I am close. The aim being to effectively represent the bottomless void in which these fears sit. Bringing light to the real horrors that individuals wake up to and face alone.

Beyond surface level fears such as snakes, heights and drowning, Circumdoleō aimed to find their psychological horrors. The subjects were interviewed in order to uncover their most terrifying reality; going through hours of discussion with each participant, trying to untangle aspects that everyone wants to hide. From there they were asked to write a letter to said fear. No criteria were set, just write.

After constant reading, I’d immerse myself into the individual’s section of hell. An image would be thought of, and a self-portrait was made. The series was intended to be more about the journey than the destination; progressing and approaching each image with the idea that “this fear is as much mine as it is theirs”, whilst tackling the challenge of trying to visualize and represent fears like these with abstract symbolism combined with a line from their respective letters.

There are key aspects of Circumdoleō that will remain mysteriously unique to the participating individuals. The page long letters that were written and the techniques used to achieve a personal proximity of state of mind. Represents a creation of images accurately recording each one’s fear. In the end becoming mentally strained knowing that these horrors that haunt people close to me could so easily become reality, I often became lost and haunted by the fears myself. What you are seeing could be your fear mirrored.